Friday, August 5, 2011

06 Aug 2011 - day 3

I woke up this morning somewhat dragging.Now that I'm at work my right inguinal lymph nodes are *throbbing* and sending diffuse pain down my leg. I'm not liking this at all.

Today is my first day taking phentermine. I read up on the stuff on PubMed and I dunno.
Frankly, I don't think I need to take an anorectic unless I have zero fat in my diet (which, based on all the fat-free cheese and soup and food they are pushing, Swedish seems to be anti-fat). I'm not really all that hungry as long as I have a bolus of fat in the morning and a slow stream of fat over the day. I rarely eat sweets or bread. I *hate* potatoes and pasta. My weaknesses are beer and rice. Now if they could hook me up with some drug that makes me puke at the sight of beer or rice, then we'd be in business.

What totally cracks me up is one of the brand names for this puppy is "Kraftobese". With all the trouble I had trying to get into pharmaceutical marketing... to see the stupid names (and direct-to-consumer ads) some of their marketing minions come up with I am amazed they still have jobs, and I didn't get one in their big pharma suit lair.

wow. halfway through the day the legal speed is kicking in. I have cotton-mouth, palpitations, and presyncope.

Thursday, August 4, 2011

05 Aug 2011

Ok it's day 2. BTW tables *fucking suck* in Blogger. I struggled with this and finally uploaded it as a picture. I can't believe they don't have any pre-fab charts in there so I don't have to do all of that <td> </td> garbage after every freakin' line of text. And when I copy-pasted from Excel, it purged all my formatting this time. And when I tried to use the table from yesterday, it wouldn't let me enter text. Fine. I'll edit the HTML - or not. Frankly, if Blogger is so crappy with tables, I'm just going to burden their server by uploading a picture of my table for every fracking day.

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

04 Aug 2011 - I'm not sure about this

It's only the first day and I'm not so sure about this hi protein lo fat dealio. The fat was what was keeping me satiated and without that, I'm still hungry after I eat and that is a little annoying. But it's worth a try and any amount of suffering and inconvenience I really should accept if it leads to my looking a little better. Frankly, I don't give a crap about if it makes me healthier or stronger or if it makes me live longer. It's all about looking good because that is all that matters in our society and for me to matter, I need to look good.
Timecaloriesg Protein
7:00 AM150-25025-30 
10:00 AM 60-16010 
1:00 PM 150-25025 
4:00 PM 60-16010 
7:00 PM 300-40035 
9:30 PM60-160 10 
12:00 AM 60-16010 

g Protein
g Carb
8:30 am

 1 egg
almond flour
1 tsp butter

11:45 am

 4 oz salmon
8 blueberries
2 pm
 4.5oz turkey deli slices
4 pm
4.5 oz turkey deli slices
6-7 pm

8 almonds
1 cup radish sprouts
4 oz salmon
1 shot tequila
11:00 pm

1 really nasty gelatin drink
3 small jalapenos


*note: I'm counting alcohol grams as carbs

03 Aug 2011 - ok let's try this again

Over the past couple weeks the combination of being really demoralized from gaining half the weight back I lost over 50 days back again in only 10 and that I have 5 separate groups of friends all of which are suddenly wanting to socialize with me over food and much drink now that I am going to be leaving for New York -- I have not been one for continuing with documenting my food intake. Why bother? I'm a fat fuck who is going to stay a fat fuck for life evidently. My body's against me, my social circles are against me, my crazy crazy hectic life is against me.

But now I have some renewed inspiration. I scheduled an appointment for the third at Swedish Weightloss Center with Dr. Lindquist. He came recommended by Dr. Eades, which is a five-star seal of approval in my books. I went to the appointment feeling drunk on hypoglycemia because I literally had *no time* to eat once I had forgotten to eat breakfast and I have no snacks in the house because I haven't had time for grocery shopping -- started my homework at 4:30AM, worked on it until 8:30, drove to class, worked on my homework in class, turned in my homework after class, drove like a bat out of hell up to Swedish and there ya go. By the time I had a second to eat, it was 3:00PM -- and it was a low carb kibble sample in the office. - oh - and a lemony calcium citrate chewy snak - waaaaaaay to sweeet :-&

Anyhoo, the skinny of what I learned from the visit is:

(a) I am fat fat super fat uber fat teh water rat - but like I didn't know that;
(b) I've lost an inch in height over the past 2 years (??);
(c) My target calories are too high;
(d) I need to eat a lot less more often; and
(e) I'm not eating enough protein

So I'm changing the diet parameters listed in the header. I know this is the 'going away' time for me and I'm going to have to fend off saboteurs, one of them being my own penchant for IPAs and sushi - but I will allow two formally sanctioned days for cheating between now and when I leave on the 25th.

So here's what I ate on the 3rd:
(AM) - orange creme flavored water (0g, 0cal)
(3PM) - salty lo carb kibbles n' bits (thank goodness I was super hungry because they wouldve been even more terrible if I weren't) (cal, carb unk)
       - sweet chewy lemony Ca-citrate snax (see note above)
(6PM) - Ninkasi Total Domination IPA (18g, 280cal)
(9PM) - 1 small zucchini (2g, 10cal)
 -3 oz pork (0g, 300cal)
orange creme flavored water
(12PM) - 1 small zucchini (2g, 10cal)
-3 oz pork (0g, 300cal)
orange creme flavored water

total: 900cal + kibble calories
22g carb + kibble carbs